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Happy Americans


Sixty needles and sixty pins
Look at all the Happy Americans
They never question, never doubt
What is this country they talk about?

Every day they’re on my TV
Being all that they can be
They’re in the army, they’re in the bar
They drive around in their manly cars
They’re all so perfect, they’re all so young
They never worry, they’re always having fun.

Sixty needles and sixty pins
Look at all those Happy Americans.

They belong to the city, they shine in the light
To the beat of the street in the heat of the night
Their hearts are on fire and they reach for the sky
The magical fantasy, the wonderful lie.

Put a smiley sticker on the problem
A band-aid on the festering wound
A nosejob won’t stop the cancer
This society is rotting from the inside
But our leaders wave the flag
More frantic as the days get shorter
While the acid rain blows in their faces
They smile and holler, “Pass the fried chicken!”

They shoot off their mouths ’cause they’re so concerned
They love explosions ’cause they never get burned
Where have you been, my blue-eyed son?
Killing Khadafy with my water gun!

User-friendly, born to win
Rows and rows of Happy Americans.

And the newspaper owner is America’s voice
This shiny product is America’s choice
It’s waiting there for you on every shelf
How could you ever want anything else?

Are you now or have you ever been
A somewhat less than Happy American?

This is the Asshole Decade
So join the Asshole Generation
Everybody’s in the rat race now
We’re working harder than we ever have before
And when we bring home the bacon
We bring home nothing but frustration!

© 1990 Undulant Rhetoric (BMI)